Come on, Carrie Bradshaw

Summer and the City by Candace Bushnell
My rating: 2 of 5 stars

I admit, I wanted to give this book three stars, but then I thought better of it…
Okay, so, I think I finally understand these books. They’re satire at its finest. The reason that Carrie Bradshaw is so abhorrent is that the author is trying to poke fun at teenage girls. I think. Or at least I hope…
After being so disappointed in the first of the series, I don’t know why I picked up the second one. If only because I am warped and can’t leave a series unfinished, even if a rotten one. But because Carrie Bradshaw is such an iconic figure, I want to know more about her roots. I want to know how she went from being a desperate teenager with only care for herself to such a beloved woman. But the thing is… I still can’t figure it out. Bushnell is writing characters, especially female ones, who for the most part are… awful…
Take Carrie’s friend Maggie, for example. She travels to New York to visit Carrie, is sleeping with two guys back home (one because he’s good at it, the other because then she can be seen in public with him), seduces one of Carrie’s friends, and proceeds to invite him back to Carrie’s apartment (well, Samantha Jones’s apartment) only to sneak off into another room and loudly copulate with him while Carrie is in the other room. My hope is that Bushnell intended to say to young girls, “If you are friends with people like this… kindly stop BEING friends with them.” Don’t get me wrong, I understand hook-ups, but… I couldn’t stand reading about Maggie for a moment longer and was thrilled when she was off the map.
Next, let’s tackle Carrie herself. Wildly insecure, Carrie complains most of the novel about how no one cares about how her life in New York is going, when really, she doesn’t try for a second to ask about anyone else’s life. She immediately falls into an affair with a man far too old for her, becomes the desperate self she was when faced with Sebastian in the first novel, and proceeds to keep seeing him even when the obvious evidence is that he is no good. Why, Carrie? Why torture yourself to this extent? I am losing sight here of how Carrie became an icon.
My hope is that Bushnell wanted to write these “early years” novels to show how far Carrie came in her life. How she went from self-centered small town girl to big city maven. My biggest fear is that Bushnell thinks that in Carrie’s selfishness people will find indearment, when (in my case anyway), I sincerely hope she’s just kidding.
While I know that Carrie soon joins in her group of Samantha, Miranda and Charlotte, my wish for the next novel (because I’m sure it will have to keep going…), get better friends. Please.

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Til Un-Death Do Us Part

Pride and Prejudice and Zombies: Dreadfully Ever After by Steve Hockensmith
My rating: 4 of 5 stars

A hilarious finish to the Pride and Prejudice and Zombies cult phenomenon. I think what I enjoyed best about this book is that the focus was not entirely around Elizabeth and Mr. Darcy. In fact, in this novel, Mary and Kitty, the last of the unwed daughters of the Bennets are given the opportunity to have their spot in the sun. And they do so by kicking ass and staying true to themselves. Also, even if in a quirky way, this book revolves around the theme that love springs eternal. Even in the undeath, Elizabeth and Mr. Darcy know that they are meant for each other and that they always will be.
Definitely an incredibly witty trilogy!

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Even More Amazing

The Book of (Even More) Awesome by Neil Pasricha
My rating: 4 of 5 stars

It’s true that in a time of turning to a news channel and hearing about how the 13th homicide has occurred already (thank you, January 15th of 2011) and reading about disastrous weather wreaking havoc in third world countries, it’s important to take a step back and think of all of the good things in the world. The awesome things that make every day just a little bit brighter.
I loved reading the Book of Awesome when I first discovered it, because it was a tome of things that I sat and thought, “Other people find this cool too?” I was extremely excited about the release of the second book, and was definitely not disappointed by the results. It’s a good book to read as a reminder of all of the beauty in the world. Of remembering that bad news isn’t the only news out there. That old people holding hands is a sign that good is always out there.
AWESOME!

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Good Girls Don’t Talk to Bad Wolves

Red Riding Hood by Sarah Blakley-Cartwright
My rating: 3 of 5 stars

When I first found this book, I had thought that it was the novel that the movie was based on. Instead, I discovered that Catherine Hardwicke had a young creative writer friend of hers pen the screenplay into a manuscript for a novel. What I have discovered when you do this is that there is a serious lack of character development. I loved the idea of the story, and I definitely ate this book up, but… from the beginning, I was confused by the characters. When Peter arrives to the town, it is a sudden and immediate love that Valerie feels for her childhood friend, but the detailing given for the beginning of their relationship is only the bare bones background story. They were young when Peter left, but the moment he reappears in the town, they are suddenly madly in love again. Even Henry’s supposed love for her is briefly glanced over before suddenly he is willing to sacrifice everything to have her…
I couldn’t go to bed after working a night shift because I found the story so seductive, but I just really wished that more of the characters and background had been developed. In the beginning, I hadn’t even realized that Valerie was a young girl and her sister too for a few pages. This book had great potential.

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Better luck next time?

An Abundance of Katherines by John Green
My rating: 3 of 5 stars

I wish that I had read this book before I read Paper Towns. Not in the least bit was this book disappointing as far as being entertaining goes, but I still didn’t enjoy it as much as his other book. John Green does have an amusing way of writing that I wish my own vernacular could cover from day to day. His characters (his male at least) are always so… Realistic. Guys that I would have loved to be friends with in high school. Unfortunately, I always find that the female characters leave something to be desired… Although in the end they typically make a confession that takes them to a more human level, I still find that they are the gloried villains of the story. The ones that the protagonist must save…
Either way, great story!

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The Tudors

The Tudors: The Complete Story of England’s Most Notorious Dynasty by G.J. Meyer
My rating: 4 of 5 stars

At first when I picked this book up, I had thought that it would be fiction. I have always been intrigued by the Tudor dynasty (since picking up The Queen’s Fool by Phillipa Gregory and not realizing that it was part of a series of books) and so I was looking forward to reading another one. When I realized that this was a history, I was a little be daunted. Nevertheless, I am not one to turn away from books and thus set out to read it. What I got was an incredibly wittingly written history of one of the most notorious families in English history. I found myself laughing in some parts, absorbing the pages with such interest that, despite the length of time it took me to read it, I did not want to put the book down. I’m glad to have learned more in-depth knowledge about this incredibly famous dynasty. Fantastically organized and written.

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If You Murdered Someone, I’d Help You Hide the Evidence

Best Friends Forever- Jennifer Weiner

God, I love this woman’s books! Lately, I’ve been following her on twitter, and she’s been getting some backlash from critics about her brand of chick lit. Okay, the idea of “Chick Lit” was likely created in Cosmo magazine (which I lately have some beefs with that are not best suited for this blog, but let me say that if a guy thinks that a girl can’t take the humour of South Park or Family Guy, then maybe we should go back a hundred years and pretend that women are all better off just pumping out babies and not having an opinion. Come on, Cosmo, you were meant to be innovative and feminist. You were supposed to be a magazine that discussed women as strong and equal to men. You’re not. Now you’re all about how pleased he should be and why you should never show your guy that you do this and this because he won’t love you.  I just said I wouldn’t rant about them, but there you are…)

Anyway, another twitter message from someone else came up that said, “Chick Lit is whatever I read.” AMEN. Let’s think about this for a moment: Chick Lit is defined as (according to Wikipedia, which I understand is not considered a valid source of information, but screw that, they know their shit!)  “genre fiction within women’s fiction which addresses issues of modern women often humorously and lightheartedly”. So, basically, Chick Lit is supposed to be a good time. It’s something that you’re supposed to be able to read and just simply enjoy. To me, Chick Lit is picking up a book and relating to the characters within it. It’s not sitting around with a knot of anxiety constantly in my belly because things are going horribly wrong. It’s not finishing a book and feeling disgusting for being a human being because we do terrible things. Trust me, I feel guilty about enough ludicrous things in a day, I don’t need a book helping me out. Chick Lit is… anything I read.

The reason that I like Weiner’s books so much is that all of her characters always seem so undeniably real. Sure, she often creates a character who is struggling with weight issues and is combating feelings of being not as great as a skinny counterpart, but Weiner doesn’t hold back. She confronts feelings that I’m sure all women experience, whether big or small. Everyone has a beef with their body, no matter what they look like. There’s always something to criticize about ourselves, no matter if everyone else in the world tells us we’re nuts, and that’s what Weiner’s characters are like.

This novel is told through the voice of Addie Downs, a woman who is extremely introverted and has spent the better part of her life hiding behind her weight. When things would go wrong in her life, she would sneak up to her room and gorge on food that she knew she shouldn’t have. In her childhood, she made friends with a girl next door named Valerie Adler, who she adored. As most friendships go, Valerie and Addie slowly grew apart as high school came, Valerie becoming popular and adored, while Addie fell by the wayside. In their senior year, something bad happened to Valerie that she didn’t want anyone to know, but Addie told out of concern for her friend. What resulted changed their friendship forever.

When the novel begins, Addie answers the door to find her friend Valerie standing there after so many years of no contact, begging for help. She thinks that she might have killed someone, and she knows that Addie is the only one she can trust to make things better…

Throughout the novel, both girls grow to learn that sometimes, true friendship does run deeper than expected and everything is not always what it seems. This novel challenges the definition of what a perfect life is and makes you question what really makes you happy.

I finished it in probably a little under two days. It was such a good read that I couldn’t put it down. Definitely worth picking up.

And so the trilogy continues…

Brisingr- Chris Paolini

I’ll admit, it took me a really long time to read this book. Had it not been for night shifts while working, I’m not sure how long it would’ve taken me to get through. And it’s not because Paolini doesn’t write an amazing book, because he most certainly does. It’s just that… well, sometimes I find that he spends so much time describing what’s going on around his main character that he misses out on the story.

This is the third book in the Eragon series (that was meant to be a trilogy…) just after another bloody battle that revealed a lot of secrets about Eragon’s life that he hadn’t expected to happen. The Varden are gathering their troops to try and wage another battle on the Empire, Eragon and Sapphira are continuing their training, and Eragon is spending his time dealing with the revelations about his family and as well his strong feelings for Arya…

And I want to tell you more. I want to give some heads up about something AMAZING that happens so that you want to pick up this book and continue with Eragon’s adventures. And while I did enjoy it once I finally got through it, I ended up feeling like Paolini is just taking too long to say something that could have already been said and over with by now. The reason I put the book down in the first place was that I rarely wanted to pick it up on the streetcar because I was growing bored with all of the descriptions and the running around in circles. And it was too freaking big! It dragged down my bag too much for my shoulder to handle. Since Paolini likely wasn’t going to be paying for my shoulder physio as a result of carrying his book around, I had to put it on my shelf and pick it up at a later date.

Don’t get me wrong, Paolini does write a good story. He has amazing ideas and the language and names alone that he uses are something to be admired. It’s obvious that this boy has done his fantasy research. When I read this, I do feel as though he has really figured out the characteristics of each of his race of fantasy figures. I am always fascinated by Eragon’s world, but my major complaint is that Paolini doesn’t seem to know when to describe more and when to realize that he needs to move on. I really don’t want to criticize, because this blog is more to help people pick up a book that they ordinarily might not. I do recommend the Eragon series to fantasy lovers out there, but I do think that Paolini should have stuck to his goal of a trilogy. When it becomes a Saga, things get weird…

And there’s really nothing I respect more than an author who recognizes when it’s time to call it quits (*cough*LibbaBray*cough*)

Overall, it was still a good read and I’m glad that I didn’t put it aside forever. I think that you should give it a try if given the opportunity. Because if you enjoy the first and the second, the third is sure to reveal things that before you might not have seen coming.

Note: In the even that for some twisted reason Libba Bray does manage to actually find my obscure blog, I want it to be known that I loved the ending of her Gemma Doyle trilogy. The reason I say that I loved that she knew when to call it quits was that the ending of her trilogy was breathtaking. I couldn’t put her book down and I found myself bawling at 3am as I finished the novel, amazed by what she had done with her book. An ending like that takes balls and the temptation to end things the way that everyone else wants you to is hard to ignore. I really feel that Bray didn’t do that. She did what she thought was best for her character in the long run, and for that, I respect her. She knew when to call it quits on Gemma’s first story, and she set her up for a beautiful second story. Ku-dos, Ms. Bray!

Arsenal can change your life

Fever Pitch- Nick Hornby

(let me say, I really wish that I owned THIS cover of the novel! Mine is not nearly as pretty or as cool. Curse you, Chapters, for not having this when I first purchased this novel!)

This novel, from one of my favourite authors, is different from the style I’m used to reading him in. Instead of his witty and quirky works of fiction, Hornby writes a memoir about how he grew up, all through his obsession with football.

Okay, so, I won’t lie, I don’t know anything about football. I played it as a kid, house league, and I had fun doing it. I watched some games of the World Cup (the result of dating a football-obsessed guy and having a brother-in-law as equally engrossed with the world of football), and I have always enjoyed watching games on television. Or being there to watch them. To say that I’m not sporty would be a ridiculous understatement. The only sport in the world that has ever managed to get me to sign up for five consecutive years was, and will remain, football. Throughout the most of this memoir, Hornby had football-specific descriptions that a greater fan would have deeply appreciated. Me? I didn’t quite get them, but Hornby still managed to have me hooked to the point that I managed to finish his memoir in the span of 2 12hr night shifts.

It’s just that Hornby is so brutally honest. In his works of fiction, he doesn’t create characters that are ludicrous at best. He creates personas that has a little bit of each of us. They’re blindingly real. In his memoir, it is apparent what makes Hornby such a fantastic writer. He self-decribes madness, and in my favourite bit that had me laugh out loud, he admits that when a girlfriend of his fainted at a game, he let someone else take care of her so that he could watch the end. A true fan, through and through. He even admits that if that were to happen again with any partner of his, he fears he’d only check on her *after* seeing the game to the end.

It’s that Hornby is truthful. We’ve all had moments where to us, something is insanely important and others don’t understand. Things that we cannot give up, no matter the cause. Times where we’ve made excuses about sick grandmothers, when really we were off catching the U2 concert because a real fan doesn’t miss a show.

Hornby may describe himself as mad when it comes to his faith with Arsenal, but there’s no denying the fact that what he truly is, is dedicated.

Serial Killer

Zombie: A Novel- Joyce Carol Oates

(unable to be linked to a place to purchase it, as it is no longer released in anything but an e-book form, according to Indigo)

I am in love with Joyce Carol Oates.

I was first introduced to her in the twelveth grade by my English teacher, who had us study one of her short stories, entitled “Where Are You Going, Where Have You Been” and I was hooked. Joyce Carol Oates writes in the most envious way. Most (if not all) of her work is dark and drags you down to a place that you might not exactly be comfortable with. But she does it in such an enthralling way that it is next to impossible to not be hooked instantly. She makes you bleed for her characters. You don’t just feel their pain, you are their pain. I know it sounds dramatic, but that’s Joyce Carol Oates for you.

Zombie tells the tale of a man, Q__ P___ who was accused of abusing a young boy. As a result, his family convinced the judge to let him off under mental health reasons, and so Q__ P___ is expected to visit various shrinks and support groups and stay faithful to his medication regime. As long as he works his job as a caretaker and tells his parents that he is attending his community college courses, they will attempt to leave him alone. But Q__ P___has the heart of a serial killer. He gets it into his mind that if he had a zombie to be his slave, he would be happy. He begins to abduct people and try to perform at home lobotomies to get his zombies. Unfortunately, he is never successful and each of his attempts ends up in the death of the person. It is only when Q__ P___ strikes close to home, a young uppermiddle class boy from his grandmother’s neighbourhood, that he is begun to be suspected.

Okay, I won’t lie, I was freaked. I read this book with a kind of nose-curling uneasiness. Oates taps into a deranged and disturbing mind, one that feels that brutality shows love. Q__ P___ is a serial killer through and through, a deranged psychopath, and Oates captures his character wonderfully. She ends her novel, through the voice of her killer, in a chilling way, where suddenly Q__ P___’s MO may change and that renders no one safe.

HORRIFYING, thank you very much.

I may have trust issues from here on in…